Who knows really. They say that the first 6 months here are the hardest. Come tomorrow, I will pass that landmark. I will also be climbing out of my biggest slump thus far. I hit a wall last week: my projects were being rejected, my community seemed hard if not impossible to motivate, a misunderstanding made a newly comfortable friendship regressed to the beginning. I felt like I was back at school with way too much work to even think about, except this time there was not a paper to write to solve my problems.
Nobody ever said Peace Corps was easy. In fact, when I asked most returned volunteers the response was generally a broad “It is an incredible, life-changing experience.” I am pretty sure people said that about seeing Avatar for the first time, so you can imagine my expectations: aside from likely lower living standards, not understanding the people I was supposed to work with very well, and new foods... I really didn’t have any.
When I got here I was astonished at my luck. Paraguay is after-all a beautiful country, with friendly people, pretty good food (obsessed with all forms of chipa, still), and dspite a minor set-back early on I was placed in a great little town ready to work. It wasn’t until Tuesday or so when the harder points of my new reality hit.
Tomorrow marks 6 months. Indeed, the newness of my situation is gone. It was a startling discovery, but it’s a new perspective, and a new opportunity. The things that didn’t work out so far, I wont continue. The things that did, I will. And all the extra time other volunteers DID warn me about but I did not understand until now, well I will utilize that for me instead of letting it make me feel like I don’t do enough. It may have taken me 6 months, but now I see that maybe I am the only one who always wants to start a worm compost or plant trees because I have no cows to milk, no chickens to feed, no children to care for, and no large fields to hoe and plant. Maybe I will change some of that (namely, a small demo-plot or field… no worries, no young children to take care of, and my neighbors politely destroyed my dream of owning a duck by reminding me that they had a pond and it would likely run towards their water… and away from me…)
The glitter may be gone, but I have 18 months left to try to make the most of my service. I will probably hit a few more walls, but the mean time I plan to continue to work for and with the town when they have time, and when they don’t, to add a little work for myself (home-made soap making? Crocheting? Painting? I have the time most people don’t have until retirement). I have no specific project or activity in mind, just a plan to utilize my opportunity to the best of my ability, because even in my low points, I recognize that it has been, and it will continue to be incredible to make my job, my home, and my life for the next 18 months in rural Paraguay.
And something is working for me, because my lack of a green thumb in the states has somehow made everything in my garden here in Paraguay start to grow! Maybe at the 9-month mark, I will at least have some amazing veggies to eat. 
Tony is the most faithful and loyal dog ever. Follows me around everywhere.
Its sugarcane season, the farmers bring it to my house to load it up in a truck.
The one thing I am really pumped about is teaching the women's committee every 15 days. Here they are making dish soap from a kit. Its a lot cheaper to make your own than to buy it in the store.
